Screw titles
by Slayers64
Summary: Dedicated to: Muu-chan and Rina-chan    MelloXMatt oneshot, dedicated to my online besties for Christmas. Hope you guys enjoy ! :D    R&R pwease  Rated M for cursing, though I doubt it really needs to be rated M, but just to be on the safe side. :


Title: Screw titles

Rated: M for cursing

Genre: Humor, romance

Warning: Contains MattXMello yaoi. dun like, dun read.

Disclaimer: No I don't own death note, however, if I did, we would all be living in a yaoi paradise~

Dedicated to: Muu-chan and Rina-chan

MelloXMatt oneshot, dedicated to my online besties for Christmas. Hope you guys enjoy~! :D

R&R pwease~ Rated M for cursing, though I doubt it really needs to be rated M, just to be on the safe side. :)

(Matt's P.O.V.)

"Matt! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU GOT ME SICK! THAT'S THE LAST TIME I MAKE OUT WITH YOU WHEN YOU'RE SICK!" Now, you might be saying to yourself right about now, "Yay! He's here! The smexy, blond, leather decked, badass, chocolate eating, mafia boss, is here! Hell yeah~!" However, if you're some kind of slow idiot, or something, and didn't bother reading the summary, that this is in fact a MelloXMatt fanfic, I'll elaborate. ._MY_.boyfriend. That's right, bitches~ I've got dibs. He's gay ladies, so tough luck. As for the dudes, touch him, and I will personally come over to wherever you're hiding at and break your balls. Try making children then, fuckers.

Anyway... Lemme get to the point, it all started one peaceful afternoon...

(YAY! Flash back~!)

'CRAAAAAASH!' Encase you're wondering what the hell that was, it was Mello's, foot connecting with my face, sending me flying into a table. Damn, I gotta say that kinda hurt. "Damn it, Matt! I told you to go out and buy me some chocolate! We're all out and I've had the worst day imaginable! On top of that, you've been playing your fucking video games all day and haven't gotten a damn thing done today! Sitting on your ass all day, isn't going to get us anywhere! Kira's out there fucking killing people, Matt! He fucking killed L for fucks sake!"

Owe, there went my eardrums. I rubbed my throbbing ears for a moment, and got up, shakily, from where Mello sent me crashing into a table, I mentioned earlier, before replying. "I got groceries," I said, matter of fact, as if that was the most amazing thing in the world. My only answer was a smack across the head. Damn, I've been suffering from a lot of abuse lately, haven't I? I'm used to Mello's tantrums though. In all honesty, I find them pretty cute. I know, I know, there has to be something seriously wrong with me. I gingerly rubbed the back of my head, groaning. 'Damn Mello needs to stop acting like a pmsing girl all the time.' "Mellooooooo, that hurt!" I whined, looking up at him. It was at that moment, I saw his face. He looked... horrible. He had bags under his eyes, his face looked as if it had aged ten years, his leather was all wrinkled, his stance was kinda awkward, and his hair was messed up, overall, he looked exhausted. However, that didn't mean the glare he was sending my way, was any less intimidating. I almost pissed my pants at how scary he looked.

"W-what happened to you? You look like crap!" I blurted out, mentally kicking myself for saying that last part. Mello rolled his eyes at me, an irked look, overcoming his facial features. "Wow Matt, nice choice of words there, I know everyone loooooooves to be told they look like crap." Mello answered, voice filled with irritated sarcasm. I sighed, exasperated, but said nothing. We just stayed like that for a while, both of us, momentarily quiet, the only noise in the room, being our breathing, before Mello spoke again.

"There was... some mafia business I had to attend to. Let's just say one of my men made a major screw up and quite frankly the biggest mistake of his life." Mello murmured, quietly, blonde hair shadowing part of his face, as he sat down at our ugly, puke-colored, shit couch.

"Ah... What exactly did he do, anyway?" I questioned, moving over, to sit beside him. He leaned back, putting his arms behind his head, angrily, whispering out, "There was an information leak, luckily, all witnesses of the information, besides our own men, were executed, before any outside sources could get their hands on it. If the guy we killed had gotten away, I would've had a crap load on my plate. Speaking about information leaks, it's _YOUR_ job to monitor what's going on too, ya know."

I just stayed silent, feeling guilty, but honestly It wasn't really my fault... I _WAS_ sick after all. Apparently Mello just remembered this fact, because he looked away, and mumbled a soft apology, "Sorry..." I waved my hand, dismissing the apology, but he still felt a little bad, and bent down to kiss my forehead. I smiled as he leaned his head against mine.

"Do you want me to make you anything to eat?" He asked, unusually calm. 'Mello cook?' I blinked in surprise. Mello must of noticed this, because he grumbled slightly, "Don't get used to this. I'm just doing this because you're sick." I smirked, "Yeah, I figured that. Anyway, yeah, I'd like something to eat."

"Okay, what do you want?" He asked, getting up to leave, once I answered. "You." I winked, watching as Mello blushed slightly. "Idiot." He murmured, under his breath, walking out, without hearing what I really wanted to eat.

It was nice, Mello wasn't usually home too often, and he was _COOKING_ for me, ah, yes, maybe I should get sick more often. I smiled, slightly at this thought, not entirely kidding.

Humming, I tapped my fingers repeatably against the couch, looking for some form of entertainment, while I waited for Mello to finish cooking what ever he was, my eyes eventually falling upon my gameboy. Well that was predictable, right?

Flipping through my games, I decided to play a random Mario game, uh... Super Mario Galaxy, I saw lying out, that I'd already won nearly sixty times, flying through it, like the unbeatable, indestructible, invincible, supreme, unshakable, unflinching, -before you ask, no, I am not almost done about bragging about how awesome I am,- all powerful, undefeatable, untouchable, unyielding, ruthless, overwhelming, the all MIGHTY master, epically amazing, kick ass, gamer I was. And _NO_, I do _NOT_ have a big ego, so stop thinking that. You freaking smart asses think you know everything...

Suddenly, a hand reached over my shoulder, and a certain somebody's gameboy got tossed over a particular blond's shoulder, behind me. Quite, carelessly, I might add. Oh and also, a hand reached to my chin, pointing my head skyward, and reached for my goggles, stretching them forwards, and letting go, causing me to flinch in pain, as they snapped back into place, probably leaving red imprints between my eyes and nose, now.

When I looked again, a smirking Mello was looking down at me, practicably nose to nose with me, causing me to blush in surprise. Before I could say anything, however,... Mello licked me. That's right. He._ FUCKING_. licked. _ME. _I gave him a wtf? look, to which, he just chuckled in surprise, walking out of the room, calling over his right shoulder, "Come on, time to eat. I made (insert random food of choice here, so I don't have to take the time, to think of something, because I'm a lazy girl.)" I continued to stare stupidly at the wall, for the next five or so minutes, still confused as to why Mello _LICKED_ me, but eventually, just shook it off, and went after him.

After we got done eating, I followed Mello into the living room, and watched as he flopped down onto the couch to read a newspaper, crossing his legs. Following him, I sat down, and stretched my legs out, resting my feet on his lap, and leaned against a pillow, one arm resting against my chest, the other hanging lazily off the couch. Mello looked up from his newspaper, and rose an eyebrow at me. "Comfortable?" "Hmmm, yeah, I am pretty comfy, thanks for asking," I laughed.

Mello rolled his eyes and smirked that sexy smirk of his, and before I knew it, he was towering over me, pinning my arms above my head. I blushed red as a tomato, as he crashed his lips into mine, making me gasp, to which he took this opportunity, to shove his tongue into my mouth. Once I got over my initial shock, I began to kiss back. The kiss was slow and passionate at first, but then Mello decided to kick things up a notch, which I was too happy to comply with. I tugged at his blonde tresses, forcing his face, closer to mine, in need, loving the feel of his soft, silky, hair, in my hands. As we fought for dominance, our tongues rubbing against each others, I couldn't help but moan out in pleasure. 'Damnit, Mello was _SO_ not getting the better of me.' As I finished this thought, I couldn't help but flip our places. However, I didn't expect us to fall of the couch in doing so.

Mello groaned, and winced, as he hit the floor, me falling on top of him, our heated little make out session, interrupted. As we both reopened our eyes, we just stared at each other, until Mello burst out laughing, making me blink, in bewilderment. "Y-you look so fucking hilarious. Your h-hair," he choked out, laughing even harder, if that was even physically possible. And sure enough, when I looked up at the mirror, on the other side of the room, my hair was _INDEED_ a mess. "Psh, you're one to talk, Mells. You should take a look at yours," I teased. He looked up and soon we both started laughing again, until our throats were soar from laughing so much.

I loved it..., loved this feeling, of having Mello back at my side again. It was pure hell when he left the orphanage, not even warning me that he was leaving in the first place, but, that was the past, and this was now. I was just happy to have him at my side.

"Mells... Do you love me?" I asked, waiting for a reply. "Of course I do! You know I love you, I've told you before. You're my precious person." His reply came in an instant, and I smiled, softly. He was so corny when it was just the two of us. 'Cheesy... Mmmmn, now I want some cheese.' "I know. I just love hearing you say it. Ya know, I love you too, right, Mells?" I answered, looking into his eyes. "Of course. It's pretty obvious, you needy bitch," he teased. "Bastard, I'm not a female dog." "And I'm not a bastard, my parents were married when they had me." "You're an orphan, how would you know?" I rolled my eyes, skywards. "Hey, I know _SOME_ things about my parents." "Yeah, sure," I said, as I toyed with his hair. Wow, that must sound so gay. I mean, I am gay and all, but..., playing with hair was for girls, and well, ya know what? Never mind.

He seemed to be enjoying it at least. After a while of us just laying next to each other, in content, Mello spoke again. "Matty, it's getting late. We should go to bed..." I nodded, sleepily, following him into the bed room. Apparently, he didn't give two shits that I was sick and all, because I didn't hear him complain, when I slipped into bed beside him, well that, and he made out with me, and all. I crawled in closer to him, leaning against his chest, as I shut my eyes, getting ready to fall asleep. "Good night, Matty." "Night, chocolate whore."

**xDDDD Well, there ya have it! I must say, I honestly had a LOT of fun writing this. It was entertaining to say the least. Anywho, hope ya like it, Muu-chan, Rina-chan. :) R&R pwease~ :D**


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